Avengers vs X-Men Battle Report # 5

AVENGERS vs X-MEN BATTLE REPORT #5

by Hector Ramirez & Frankie Rodriguez 

 And now it is time to catch you up with Avengers vs. X-Men Battle Report. Now, we are not going to cover the books that came out on June 20th. But we will cover all the other books of the last 3 weeks.





X-Men Legacy # 266 & 267:

   This 2-parter starts out earlier than the rest.We start with Kitty Pryde and Rachel Grey going over what has been going on recently with Cyclops' faction of the X-Men and the Avengers. While there seem to be some that think that Hope can't handle the Phoenix, Rachel thinks she can. (Being her Aunt might have something to do with that). So, Rachel argues that they can no longer sit on the sidelines while Kitty disagrees. While the majority of the staff decide to stay in the school and look after the kids, Rachel and Bobby (Iceman), are the first to go join with Cyclops.

   Shortly after their departure, Falcon, Moon Knight and She-Hulk arrive to ... well, to make sure that no one else is the Jean Grey School joins up with Cyclops' faction. At which point, both Frenzy and Gambit were ready to rip their heads off for coming into their home and telling them what to do. After Kitty asks to speak to either Wolverine or Beast, Falcon answers that they are not available. And Moon Knight chirps how if they want to believe everything will be okay is fine but not to have "you people" add to the problems Which Frenzy replies with . .."Did the guy in the White Hood just say You People." After Kitty lays down the law, everyone returns to class while the 3 Avengers must watch from 100 yards away. That is till Frenzy returns to keep an eye on them. After a brief insult from Moon Knight, Frenzy returns the insult with mocking how Moon Knight was crazy even before he put the costume on. And then ... FIGHT ENSUES. Rogue ends up going old school with her powers and Iron Man shows up .... let's just say that things look bad but definitely an awesome battle to behold.



Wolverine and the X-men #11:


 We start off with Kid Gladiator and Warbird fleeing the planet under Gladiator's orders, but Kid Gladiator decides to join the X-Men in battle. As this happens Hope and Logan are attacked by Shi'ar Death Commandos but Hope dispatches them with a Phoenix burst. Multiple battles ensue including a repeat of Spidey vs Colossus with an inaccurate panel and Gambit being knocked out by Cap again. Iceman turns the table on Red Hulk after a seemingly one sided ass whooping. Bobby's victory was then followed up by Kid Gladiator sucker punching Red Hulk. Now, both teams are in trouble with the arrival of Gladiator looking for his son.


Avengers #27: 

   The Protector betrays the Avengers by getting the Anti-Phoenix machine to the Kree Supreme Intelligence while the original outer space team still is reeling from their confrontation with the Phoenix.


AvX Round 5: 

So the Avengers and X-Men are fighting it out on the moon after Logan betrays Hope to the Avengers and is in turn betrayed by Rachel. Hope loses her temper with all the fighting around her and the close proximity of the Phoenix causing another burst. She pleads with Logan to kill her but Scott stops him. Meanwhile, Tony Stark has built a machine to kill the Phoenix but it instead diverts the Phoenix Force into Scott, Emma, Magik, Namor, and Piotr. As the Phoenix Five the return to Earth with a mission of evolution. No clear battles.


Secret Avengers #27:

     So, Captain Britain seemingly feels like a fish out of water or putting his foot in his mouth with the Secret Avengers. Meanwhile, the Kree have brainwashed Captain Mar-vell but still very much the hero he always was at the core. Seeing him justifying what he's doing while still serving the Kree is proving interesting.


Avengers Academy #31: 

 After spending last issue fighting amongst themselves, Shaw revealed that he was trying to free the Generation Hope Kids from the Avengers Academy staff (including Tigra, Hercules and more). The issue seemed to have a big turn as the two faction as X-23, Richocet, Hollow and Wiz Kid help the Generation Hope kids. Tigra then talks to Shaw and decides to help the children escape.



Uncanny X-Men #13: 

As the events of AvX Round 5 unfold Storm, Magneto, Psylocke, and Mr. Nemesis find themselves in an abandoned building swapping stories of domestic abuse, traitorous children, arm breaking Hulks, and in the case of Nemesis incoherent babbling all results of war. They all of course wish they could be in the thick of things. Meanwhile Hope's friends from Utopia attempt to find their place in the events unfolding by questioning Unit. Unit speaks of a former Phoenix host bringing revolution to hert planet with the help of 5 underlings. Believing they were meant to help Hope do the same seek to do that but Unit has Danger stop for he is curious to see what a Phoenix does without such help. No Avenger/X-Men battles but Danger sure beats the shit out of the would be Phoenix crew.

Vs #3: 

We start off with Red Hulk tearing Colossus up and getting bored so he tosses him to The Thing and thus begins our first fight.Ben starts beating Piotr's(see that writers Piotr not Peter get it right dammit) face into the ground who retaliates by smacking him with a slab of stone.Ben recomposes himself and throws a stone down Piotr's throat then headbutts him in the gut. This sends them flying to an area of the moon with no oxygen where Ben can't keep up and Piotr knocks him unconscious, X-Men's victory. Next, Piotr's little sister Illyana aka Magik takes on the lovely Black Widow. While Natalia is a formidable opponent even when being attacked by demons in limbo (where the writers thought untranslated bits of Russian dialogue was a good idea :/) Magik turns the tables on Natalia by impaling her from behind with her magical blade thankfully only rendering her unconscious with its magical properties. And thus the Rasputin bunch has won this issue for the X-Men.

AVX BATTLE RESULTS:


Rogue vs. She -Hulk;    Winner: No Contest (due to switching fighting partners)


Frenzy vs. Moon Knight   Winner: Frenzy (both verbally and physically) 


Rogue vs. She-Hulk, Moon Knight, Falcon & Iron Man [Drone]   Winner: ROGUE!!!


Iron Man [Drone] vs. Gambit      Winner: Iron Man [Drone]


She-Hulk vs. Frenzy    Winner: No Contest


Hellion, Match & another Mutant vs. She-Hulk      Winner: She-Hulk 


Sebastian Shaw vs. Avengers Academy Staff       Winner: No Contest (stopped by Students)


Avengers Academy Students vs. Generation Hope, Ricochet, Wiz Kid and Hollow.     Winner: Gen Hope


Unit & Danger vs. Generation Hope             Winner: Unit & Danger 


The Thing vs. Colossonaunt                  Winner: Colossonaunt 


Black Widow vs. Magik                   Winner:  Magik

Protector vs. The Avengers                 Winner: Protector


Iron Fist vs. Marvel Girl (aka Rachel Grey)     Winner: Marvel Girl 


Iceman vs. Red Hulk                     Winner: Iceman 


Death Commandos vs. Hope Summers & Wolverine             Winner: Hope Summers & Wolverine


Black Panther vs. Storm          Winner: No Contest 


Avengers vs. X-Men (Match 5)     Winner: The X-Men 


The Phoenix vs. Iron Man & his Anti Phoenix Buster      Winner: THE PHOENIX 

INJURY LIST:

- Gen Hope got some minor concussions and their minds tampered with.

- Any Avengers or X-Men on the Moon were burned by Hope and the Phoenix.

- Magik has a slightly cracked jaw

- Black Widow has to deal with the Soul Sword messing with her soul.

- Psylocke has a broken arm.

 - Thing's skin got cracked

 - Cyclops has some cuts and concussions thanks to both Wolverine and Captain America.

- Red Hulk has frost bite.

 - Iron Fist has to deal with massive headaches.

 - The Avengers Academy staff and Sebastian Shaw have bruises.

 - The Death Commandos are ... well, mostly dead.

 - Hope has bullet holes and cuts in her ... no ... wait  ... she mimicked Wolverine. She's good.

- Danger is dealing with being hacked by Unit.

 - The Phoenix got split into 5 thanks to Tony Stark.

- Hellion has ruptured Ear drums.

- Captain Britain is eating crow like it's going out of style.

- Dr. Nemesis is still reeling from Black Widow's stingers.



NOTES:


- So yeah. Thanks to Tony Stark ... the Phoenix now has 5 hosts. 


- Scott Summers is a host of the Phoenix. So is Emma Frost. So is Namor. Heaven help the Avengers. 


- You know, with Falcon, She-Hulk and Moon Knight rolling up to the Jean Grey School like they did, the Avengers are REALLY starting to look like Bullies. 


- Magneto, Storm & Psylocke toast wishing they were with the others on the Moon. Let's thank God that they weren't there. 


- Unit is reminding me of Sinister. 


- First, we get implied racism from Moon Knight. Then we get nearly overt racism from She-Hulk when she calls a mutant a Monster. Pot CALLING Kettle bitch!


- The Death Commandos ... glad they are dead but wish Rachel had killed them. 


- Rogue beats the Avengers . ...AGAIN. 


- Gambit is faster than Iron Man (Drone) targeting systems. Go on Gambit. 


- Frenzy is proving herself quite the X-Man. 


- Storm is gonna start calling T'Challa her Estranged Husband. That's NOT GOOD! Bad enough one marriage is on the rocks (Luke  & Jessica Cage) but now Storm and Black Panther too?!


- So Colossus now has his own power, the powers of the Juggernaut AND the powers of the Phoenix. Oh my GOD! 


- Iceman beating Red Hulk ... DAMN!!!


- Thank Tony Stark for trying to kill the Phoenix. 


NEXT: And now ... The Scarlet Witch! (This time, for sure.)